Are you sick and tired of wasting your mental and emotional energy worrying about past trauma and reliving said events in your mind? It ends up sabotaging yourself, your performance, and the relationships you’ve made, at times. You will end up playing the “what if” game in your mind?
Let’s be honest, feeling anxious can make you feel miserable and can suck the enjoyment out of life. It does this because it is impossible for you to be in the present moment when you are constantly worried about future or past events. Here’s the deal—it doesn’t have to be that way. Here’s some tips on how to stop being anxious and get your calm back.
The Difference Between Feeling Anxious and Having Anxiety
Feeling anxious is part of the human experience and is a normal stress response. When the stress is gone, the anxiety normally goes away, too. But with an anxiety disorder, the stressful trigger is removed but the anxiety can still be actively present.
There are multiple anxiety disorders with different characteristics. If you are concerned that you could have one of them, it is better to be evaluated by your doctor, especially since anxiety is very common. According to research, up to 33% of Americans will experience an anxiety disorder one point during their lifetime.
What Can You Do to Manage Feeling Anxious?
The great news is that there’s a lot that you can do to help stop being anxious. Scientist are learning more and more every day about ways which can help you manage feeling anxious.
Twenty tips might be overwhelming for some people but remember: you are not expected to include every tip on this list. Look at it as a menu of potential options. You can pick and choose whatever you want and leave the rest for a later time.
Here are 20 tips on how to stop being anxious:
- Eat the Right Food
It might come as a surprise, but certain foods can make help worsen your anxiety, such as sugary foods, processed foods, caffeine, alcohol, and artificial sweeteners.[3]
Here are some foods you can try instead to help reduce anxiety: Brazil nuts, fatty fish, eggs, pumpkin seeds, dark chocolate, Turmeric, Chamomile, yogurt, and green tea.[4]
- Stay Hydrated
One simple tip to help with anxiety is by staying hydrated. Even being mildly dehydrated has been shown to make anxiety worse.[5]
- Work Some Mindfulness into Your Day
This one shouldn’t surprise anyone. Meditation and diaphragmatic breathing (breathing into your belly and engaging your abdominals upon exhale) are what usually comes to mind, but there are some other fast and easy exercises that can help calm you down almost immediately.
- Get Some Exercise
Completing at least 30 minutes of exercise three to five days a week may significantly improve symptoms of anxiety. Even as little as 10 minutes has a positive impact.[6]
In one study, exercise was shown to be as effective as medication in the treatment of symptoms of anxiety, with higher intensity exercise more effective than lower intensity exercise.[7]
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- Sit With It/Observe It
Dr. Judson Brewer recently penned a book (and an app) entitled Unwinding Anxiety: New Science Shows How to Break the Cycles of Worry and Fear to Heal Your Mind in which he discusses turning toward our emotions as a way to process them rather than distracting ourselves or bottling things up (turning away).
He encourages people to be an observer of the emotional response in their bodies, almost as if conducting a research project in great detail and noting the exact location of physical sensations (stomach, right or left side, front or back) with as much detail as possible.
- Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is an approach that utilizes the cyclical connection between our thoughts, emotions, and behaviours to control unwanted (anxious) thoughts.
One exercise to stop ruminating thoughts includes picturing a stop sign in detail, instructing yourself to “stop,” and then changing the narrative to something positive, encouraging, or even more realistic or likely.
Another CBT exercise involves challenging negative thought patterns and beliefs for validity by asking yourself:
- Is there evidence for my thought or am I making assumptions?
- What’s the worst that could happen? Is this likely?
- What’s the best that could happen?
- What’s most likely to happen?
- Will this matter in a week, a year, or five years from now?
- Realize What You Can and Can’t Control
Act where you can. Many of us spend time worrying and feeling anxious over things that we can’t control.
Figure out what you can do and act from there. Studies show that acting reduces anxiety.[8]
- Gratitude
Reminding ourselves of the good things in our lives and not only brings positivity to us also reduces anxiety. This is because it is neurologically impossible for our brain to focus on the negative and positive information at the same time.[9]
- Volunteer or Do Something for Someone Else
Helping others feels good. It also reduces stress, boosts our immune system, and can help us live longer.[10]
- Journal in the 3rd Person
The practice of journaling has long been known as a valuable tool to help us manage our emotions, and it can also help us stop being anxious and regain our calm.
Making a point to name the emotions you are experiencing (“name it to tame it”) is a principal Dr. Dan Siegel discovered that heightens the value of journaling. More recently, Dr. Kross, in his book, Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It, noted that journaling in the 3rd person (as if narrating your life) creates further value by creating some distance between you and the emotion you are experiencing, thus allowing you to breathe easier and gain perspective.
- Go Out into Nature
Spending time in nature has been shown to improve attention, lower stress, improve mood, reduce the risk of psychiatric disorders, and even cause upticks in empathy and cooperation.[11]
- Spend Time with Animals
Dogs are not only your best friend, but it turns out they are good for your mental and emotional health, too. The fact that cats just allow you to live with them as their servant doesn’t detract from the positive impact they also have on our emotional well-being.
Spending time cuddling with your pet on the couch can decrease levels of cortisol (a stress-related hormone) and lower blood pressure. Other studies have also found that animals can reduce loneliness, increase feelings of social support, and boost your mood.[12]
- Get Good Sleep
Getting good sleep can be difficult when we feel anxious but being tired can worsen the issue. Try sticking to a consistent bedtime, make your bedroom dark, the temperature cool, and limit screen time before going to sleep.
- Limit Alcohol and Caffeine
Alcohol changes the level of neurotransmitters in our brain. This can lead to a heightened sense of anxiety. Caffeine is a stimulant, specifically stimulating our fight or flight response, which is already more sensitive for those struggling with anxiety. Use both in moderation.
- Show Yourself Compassion and Encouragement
What would you say to your best friend? Many times we make things worse by shaming or berating ourselves for feeling anxious because we fear it makes us appear weak or vulnerable. This makes the problem worse.
What would your best friend say to you? Stop beating yourself up and be your own best friend.
- Spend Time with Friends
Healthy friendships make us feel included, improve self-confidence and self-esteem, and thus, help reduce anxiety.[13]
- Create Balance in Your Life
Set healthy boundaries and priorities, and don’t be afraid to enforce them. Nobody else can do this for you. Value yourself. You are worth it.
- Have a Plan
Another tip to help you stop being anxious is to have a plan. Knowing what you will do takes away a lot of the “what if” thoughts in your mind. Being certain about some things and managing your expectations can help give you peace of mind.
- Remind Yourself of a Past Event
You can try to remind yourself of a past event in your life when you were anxious, but it still ended up being okay. Have confidence that you will make it through the situation, too.
- Have Some Structure or Routine in Your Day
Knowing what to expect can reduce anxiety big time and the fear that can accompany uncertainty.[14] Give yourself as much structure as you possibly need. You’ll thank yourself for it.
Final Thoughts
It can be difficult to manage your feelings of being anxious. But take charge and pick a few of these to try out. Be consistent with it and see how you feel.
You can always remove what doesn’t work for you and try something else to try. Confide in a friend that you are implementing some new strategies and get some support.
Always tell your doctor about your concerns, and don’t hesitate to get help if you are having difficulty managing things on your own. Good luck!
